Thursday, December 01, 2005

how do you convince someone to accept a gift?

I occasionally see items that I think my mother would enjoy. However, my mother doesn't like it when I spend money on stuff for her. It's a knee-jerk reaction that seems to prevent any enjoyment of said gifts. I was hoping that we could get past this behavior, but I don't think it is possible.

For example, she adores Chanel No. 5. She has been hoarding a bottle of it for decades now. I think I was 8 the last time she actually wore it. For all she knows, the perfume has actually gone bad. I told her that she should wear it just for fun, since she can always buy another bottle if she uses it up. And life is short, why not enjoy it? However, I don't think she can get past that need to hoard the things that she likes.

It's such a pity, because there are so many fun perfumes that I think she'd like to try, if she were open to trying them. But at this point, a present just means more clutter for her, so it's probably better for her peace of mind if I don't give her presents.

So, I will just have to give up.

must. give. in. gracefully... as if.

Still, from this lesson I have distilled a new rule of life. If I'm not going to use it, I don't need it. (Yes, I don't need those adorable and fluffy Totoro catbus stuffed animals, or those collectible Totoro key chains. Really, I don't. Even though I waaant them. And Studio Ghibli isn't evil like the Disney Company...)

I need to go frame my SlamDunk Io card. If it's art it's useful. Haha.


Patty said...

Maybe buy her a bottle of something and then decant into a smaller bottle, then just refill her every time she runs out. :) Sometimes people hoard a thing, and bottles can be one of them, but if it looks not so nice, like just a plain spray bottle, she may be fine with using it.

Or I could be way wrong. Thanks for the link, BTW!

Winifred said...

OmyGosh, do parents of the same generation just act the same? can I repost your blog on my blog site? I haven't *attemped* to buy my mom gifts for the past 2 seasons, I just send out a check... but you know, it just does not bring the same amt of happiness as an actual gift if I gave it to her, and it's also easily forgotten...

kuri said...

Patty - Thanks for the idea. I will definitely have to try that. Glad you like the link.

Winifred - I guess parents are universal. I want to give them presents that they will actually like and not find burdensome. Of course you can repost my blog.